You / Them
Subtitle
An exploration of relational dynamics between you and another person.
Overview
Summary
Explore the dynamic between you and another person. Highlights your energy, their energy, and what may be shaping the connection.
Level
Beginner
Layout
Two Card Row
Introduction
You / Them is a simple relational spread for reflecting on a connection between you and another person. It is not designed for prediction or blame. It is a mirror. One card clarifies what you are bringing into the dynamic, and the other clarifies how the other side is showing up in the relationship as you experience it.
This spread can be used for romantic, friendship, family, or work relationships. Its purpose is not to decide who is right. It helps you notice patterns, mismatches, and places where clarity, compassion, or boundaries may support the connection.
Instructions
Name the relationship clearly and set a respectful focus, such as:
What is the energy between us right now?
What is shaping the connection at this moment?Shuffle the deck while holding the relationship in mind, without trying to control the outcome.
Cut the deck when you feel ready.
Draw two cards and lay them out side by side, You on the left and Them on the right.
Reflect on what each card suggests about needs, expectations, and emotional tone.
Optional: draw a third card asking, What supports understanding or healthy boundaries?
Positions in this Spread
1
Position 1: You
The card in this position of the spread reflects what you are bringing into the relationship. It may highlight feelings, intentions, behaviors, needs, or an area for growth or self-awareness.
2
Position 2: Them
The card in this position of the spread reflects the energy of the other person as it shows up in the dynamic. It may suggest what the relationship is inviting you to understand about their perspective, priorities, or boundaries, rather than making claims about their inner thoughts.
Interpreting this Spread
Read the You card first with honesty and self compassion. Notice what you are expressing clearly, what you may be protecting, and what you might be overlooking.
Read the Them card symbolically rather than literally. Treat it as information about the relational field, how the connection feels, what seems emphasized, and where friction may be present. Avoid using it as a verdict on who the other person is.
Then compare the two cards. Look for alignment, tension, or imbalance. Consider what the spread suggests about communication, expectations, and boundaries, and what adjustments, internal or external, could make the connection healthier and more workable.
More About this Spread
You / Them is best used for self awareness rather than prediction or control. Tarot reflects perspective and pattern more than objective certainty, so this spread works most effectively when you stay close to your own choices, responses, and boundaries.
If you want to explore further, follow with a spread focused on communication, next steps, or what supports growth, rather than trying to force an outcome.
Editorial
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Snippet
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A two card spread for reflecting on the dynamic between you and another person.
Teaser
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Use You / Them to understand what you are bringing into a relationship and how the connection is showing up right now. It highlights patterns, tension, and where boundaries may help.
Meta Description
Used for search engines and social previews. Summarize the page in ~150–160 characters, include the key term naturally, and avoid quotes or line breaks.
You / Them is a two card tarot spread for exploring relational dynamics. Draw one card for you and one for them to clarify patterns, needs, and boundaries.